Tuesday, September 8, 2009

The Greatest Toy in the World

Emmy has discovered the greatest toy in the world...its called the top of the pasta sauce jar.

When washed and presented to an infant, assorted lids can keep children distracted for hours. I discovered the value of this specific spaghetti sauce lid when Em figured out how to open the sprinkle canister. Desperate to distract for an additional five minutes so that I could pull the cookies out the oven, I frantically handed over the nearest, non-choking hazard object.

This lid was it.

She's been fiddling with, passing it back and forth between her hands, and slobbering on it for quite some time.

I also gave her an ear of corn but it didn't go over as big.

Monday, September 7, 2009

Me Want Food!

I am having an eating day...

Have you ever had one of those days where you just wanted to eat all day long? I have them once about every 30 days or so. I'm usually pretty well behaved, appetite-ly speaking, but then, BOOM!

Doritos are consumed by the bag, I suck down brownies and whole loaves of bread. I dip apples in peanut butter and drink milk from the carton. I'm kinda bummed this is happening again because from what I had heard, the little friend that comes to town bringing these shark attacks of food consumption, was supposed to be gone for at least a year, as that is how long I plan on breastfeeding.

But no. No, not for me.

Aunt Flo came back in full force last month...while we were on vacation.

The SECOND DAY of the first vacation K.O. and I had taken in three years.

I just don't get it, my sister-in-law is still holding off the backslide and HER baby is over 12 months old. Emmy is JUST seven months today...what the hell?

The only difference is that she exclusively breastfed her daughter until she was almost a year and we started incorporating solid foods into Em's diet four weeks ago. Maybe the extra toll of breastfeeding a VERY HUNGRY, larger baby convinced her body to keep itself barren for longer. Maybe her boobs sent a message to her brain, complaining of all the EXTRA work they were putting in and filed for an extended vacation at the end of their run as "food source".

All I know, I could get pregnant again.

Arg. No thank you.

I like that Emmy gets to be the only little girl, that she gets all of my time and all of my energy. I don't think we'll be "trying" again anytime soon; I'd like for Emmy to be in pre-school (at least!) before we bring home a little sister.

Yeah, a new baby is not what we need.

What I do need is some glass cleaner and a candy bar.

I think I'm going to look on line as to how to make Windex out of home ingredients.

I will not be looking up how to make candy bars as I'm pretty sure you can't make chocolate out of vinegar and tomatoes.

Sunday, September 6, 2009

Bagels-Crazy Rings of Madness

Man, those bagels took FOREVER right?

...and guess what?

My bagels were not as good as anything I've bought from Wegmans.

I don't think my bagels were as good as anything Wegmans throws AWAY.

Ends up, bagels are harder to make than just punching a hole in some dough. There was boiling, 15 minutes of hand kneading, and all other kinds of nonsense involved. It took forever...and what did I end up with?

10 or so tiny, misshapen bagels that tasted kinda gluey and smelled like cheese. Now granted, I did ADD cheese to the dough, so the cheesy smell, while a bit off putting, wasn't completely unexpected.

Blarg.

Now ask me if I learned my lesson and STOPPED making bagels.

No, no I did not learn my lesson and tried to make another batch on Friday, the results?

11(!) small, misshapen bagels that taste MUCH less like glue and don't smell like the rind of a wheel of Parmesan...'cause I added more water and no cheese this time. I also found out that if I bake things on the bottom shelf of my oven they come out much more delicious than if I bake them on the top.

Crazy super skinny mystery oven.

So what else is happening in the Myers household?

A sad thing, K.O.'s grandmother, Isabell, died. While it was a quiet and peaceful passing, it was still unexpected and we are making arrangements to head up to Wyoming, Pa to attend her funeral. Isabell was a lovely woman who gave me cookies from the tin she kept in her room and told me I always smell good. She never met our daughter and that is a disappointing and regretful situation. Currently, we are trying to decide the best way to travel such a long way with Emery. We are anti-drugging, but pro-no-screaming-forever-in the car.

In other news, hubby's website launched to some genuine success. Its a skeptical-based initiative focusing on connecting like minded people with groups and other skeptic based folks in their area. Interested? Check out the site.

I'll be posting about what its like to be married to/raising a child with a skeptical partner. Don't get me wrong, I have my fair share of criticism for things like holistic medicine and the fundamental rhetoric, but I don't identify myself as "a skeptic". I'm Jewish. I like being Jewish and we're raising our daughter to be Jewish. The difference, at times, is frustrating, but we're makin' it work.

'Cause we're like that.

Yo.

Gotta go-Em's frozen bagel is beginning to thaw and is no long acting as the stand-in teething ring/parent I need it to be.

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Bacon and Bakin'

I love bacon...we had breakfast for dinner last night, and I must say, organic, wholesome preachings aside, Smithfield bacon is the best bacon in the world.

I've had Amish bacon, Trader Joe's organic bacon, turkey bacon (or "facon" as I had taken to calling it), every bloody kind of fried up fatty pork strip that exists under the sun.

I declare that Smithfield bacon is the superior product.

And it was just on sale, so double win.

**************

In other news, I am attempting to bake bagels today, as I am out of bagels and too lazy to go to the store.

I'm confident that my bagels will turn out at least as good as anything I can buy at Wegmans. I'm basing this belief on the fact I've been making a lot of bread recently and it has all turned out rather lovely.

I mean, how hard could making a bagel be?

What? I have to add a hole to roll?

I can add a hole no problem! In fact, just the other day, I added a hole to my wall accidentally! And if I can add a hole to a WALL on ACCIDENT, imagine what I can do to bread dough when I'm TRYING.

This will be awesome.